Discipline

"Discipline is doing what you don't want to do so you can do what you want to do."

Jeff Fisher

I get up at 5am every morning during the week. Sometimes this is easy. Like last week. I hopped out of bed with a smile on my face and some pep in my step. Sometimes this is not so easy. Like this week. But, I still drag my butt out of bed, lace up my running shoes and I am out of the door by 5:40am.

Luckily for me this week, there is a lot of easy running on my schedule because I am racing the Frostbite 15k on Sunday, but I did have a hard hill workout on Tuesday. This was the last CAR hill workout until the summer and I wanted it to be fun. I wanted to do 8 hill repeats. I was determined to do 8 hill repeats. I envisioned myself bounding up the hill like a gazelle. Last week's 7 hills were so great! After the first repeat on Tuesday, the gazelle visions were gone and replaced with a sloth. I just felt, well - blahhh.  I was trying to gauge what was going on with me throughout the next couple intervals. Nothing hurt. That is GOOD! My body was kind of tired, which is understandable. I ran 61 miles last week but that was not it either. It was mental. I was sure of it by the 6th hill repeat. One of my teammates asked me how many more I was doing after that 6th one and I tersely replied, "#%@#!*! EIGHT" Then, under my breath, "...even if I have to power walk up this silly hill." I wanted to wimp out. I wanted to call it a day after one. I am so happy I did all 8. I didn't necessarily finish feeling strong or confident but I felt accomplished knowing that I pushed through a hard workout and I will be stronger because of it.

Why did I feel compelled to keep going? Because I have a goal. Two months from right now, I will have my toes in the sand, a beer in my hand and a shiny new Shamrock marathon medal around my neck. The marathon is hard and although I love it, training is not always a walk in the park. This is not just because of the distance but because it's such an emotional roller coaster. During the race, for example, miles 15 and 16 can be awesome - smooth sailing - and then here comes mile 17 and things get hard. (Heck - it can even be mile 3 when things get hard!) The negative thoughts will start creeping in my mind: 

• This is a stupid hobby.
• Why do I do this?
• I am never doing this again.
• I hate running.
• I am tired.
• I am too hot.
• I am thirsty.

But, I push through and by 17.5, I am happy again. This can happen a lot over the course of 26.2 miles. I figure, if I can emulate those hard times and push through them in training, I just hope it will make those moments in the race so much easier to tackle. They will come.

I have two months to go. I know I won't want to run some days or go to a workout, but I will. I will keep giving 110%. There is no other option for me. I will keep pushing.